I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Randomize
