I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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