Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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