areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
Just took my morning after pill in the library
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Randomize
