But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Randomize
