Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
Randomize
