I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
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