I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
operation have a gay friend backfired
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
Randomize
