Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
Everclear isn't food dammit
Randomize
