it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
She's JV to your varsity
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
