I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Randomize
