just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
