She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
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