Where did you get a picture of my penis
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
Randomize
