So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
Randomize
