I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Randomize
