im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Randomize
