I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
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