I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
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