i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
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