so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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