I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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