After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
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