I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
I think I just sharted jello shots
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
