Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
operation harelip BJ is a go
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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