I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
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