The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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