So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off