he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You took a bar mat shot.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
Randomize