? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Randomize
