fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
