There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
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