I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
