:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
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