her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
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