I'm going to jail i love you
Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
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