Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Randomize
