what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Randomize
