I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
I won't apologize to a one balled man
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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