Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
