apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
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