I want to stick my p in your. b.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
Randomize
