it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize
