Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Randomize
