It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
These Dirty People Haven’t Told Their SO About Their Kinky Fetish
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
This is Why People Stop Sex Halfway Through
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16