I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
25 Women On How They Let Their Oblivious Partners Know They Want To Bone
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Tumblr User Tells Story About A ‘Demon Gets Adopted By A Grandma’& It Needs To Be A F**king Movie
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday