We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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