he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Randomize
