Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
Shitshow foam night was such a success
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Randomize
