im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
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