To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock