Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
Randomize
